*** some spoilers below for Buffy, Star Trek Voyager and DS9, You're Beautiful, Insatiable, Bojack Horseman, How I Met Your Mother, Crazy Ex Girlfriend, Friends, The Orville
I have a lot of unpopular opinions when it comes to relationships in television shows. Like, I feel that certain characters just belong together!
As a result, I've compiled a list of my most unpopular relationship opinions for your reading pleasure. Or fury. Or enjoyment. Or disgust. Or all of the above.
BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER
BUFFY AND XANDER
I've been rewatching Buffy the Vampire Slayer. As the seasons go on . . . I wish these two had romantic feelings for each other. Mostly, I see things from Buffy's perspective. Vampire who lost his soul, vampire who twisted love with death, ordinary military man who couldn't handle her strength . . . Then, you get Xander! Xander, Buffy's greatest cheerleader, as well as a source of support and heart (literally in Season 4). He also grew so much throughout the series, and got over any resentment he felt when Buffy didn't reciprocate his feelings. He's one of Buffy's best friends. If romance were in the mix, I think the two would be so happy together.
STAR TREK: VOYAGER
CHAKOTAY AND JANEWAY
I'm glad that these two didn't get together. I really am. I think the rationale of Janeway being professional and not having a romantic relationship with the crew made a lot of sense. But . . . if they had gotten together, I think that would make sense, too. They were both the mommy and daddy characters of Voyager. Taking care of the crew. And, in Resolutions, there's so much chemistry! When the two touch hands? It's, like, kiss already! Although I ultimately respect the decision to keep Janeway single (and date a hologram in later seasons . . .) well, I would have been happy also if these two had gotten together.
미남이시네요 YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL
KO MI-NYEO AND JEREMY
I wish these two had ended up together. So much! Mostly because I hated Mi-nyeo's other suitors. Hwang Tae-kyung was an arrogant jerk, no matter his redeeming qualities. Why did they end up together? K-Drama formula? And don't even get me started on Kang Shin-woo. In an attempt to write a romantic character, I felt he just ended up kind of . . . what's the world . . . sexist? Like, he was just trying to win Mi-nyeo as if she were an object. Finishing this triad of suitors, we have Jeremy. When Mi-nyeo was disguised as her brother, Mi-nam, Jeremy accepted that he might be gay—and, by extension, that Mi-nyeon/Mi-nam would be worth a gay awakening. Then, when he learned Mi-nyeon was a woman, and got rejected by her, he backed off. Jeremy accepted Mi-nyeo as a man, woman, lover, friend—unconditionally. And besides . . . how cute was Jeremy!
BOB, BOB, AND CORALEE
When this trouple broke up, I was so sad! Part of it was because we got to see things from Bob Armstrong’s perspective, and how broken up inside he was! The worst part in season 2 was watching how there was potential for the three of them to work. When Bob Barnard and Coralee become best friends, it’s like, these three people are drawn together! Their feelings for the others might not be uniform, but feelings are there nevertheless. They all clearly have emotional intimacy/friendship/romantic intimacy/sexual intimacy with one another. Now, if they can just work out the kinks (pun intended), they might be able to be together! Bob, Bob, and Coralee, for heavens sakes, please just sit and talk with each other!
STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE
GARAK AND DR. PARMAK
It feels like everyone ships Garashir . . . and I get it, especially after reading books like A Stitch in Time, where they really went into details about feelings. And Una McCormak? She rode that Garashir train! Whoooo! Garashir is so cute together and, when a writer puts the effort in, there's a lot. But you know who seemed to have far more chemistry with Garak? Dr. Parmak. Dr. Parmak is, in my opinion, so compatible with Garak. They're just on the same wavelength, and complement each other well. When you compare Bashir and Parmak . . . Bashir is like a schoolboy crush, and Parmak is like the one true love. There's potential for a sci fi rom com here. I wish we had seen Dr. Parmak in the series! Maybe Garak will have a cameo in Picard? I mean, he's the leader of Caradassia in the books, so . . . he should be. And then he can bring Dr. Parmak along with him. For fun, let's have Alexander Siddig play Dr. Parmak, okay? That would be awesome.
BOJACK AND DIANE
Okay, so this relationship is 50/50. Looking at probability, it might be a great relationship. It might also be toxic to the extreme. But . . . about as toxic as any other relationship Bojack engaged in? Who knows? Maybe once he gets out of prison, he'll be a better person, more ready for a relationship. And from Diane's perspective . . . Guy was a lovely guy. He was perfect for Diane with his emotional stability and unconditional love. But Bojack and Diane had chemistry. They were an intellectual match for one another, and throughout the series they were on the same page for a lot of things. They also challenged each other be better people. If they got together, there's about a 50% chance it would be a good idea.
HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER
TED MOSBY AND ROBIN
How I Met Your Mother, arguably, had one of the worst endings. Don’t get me wrong, I think the two-parter finale needed to be fleshed out more. But, by the ending, when Ted and Robin got together . . . of course they got together!!! The entire series was leading up to this. One of the greatest themes in the series was the need for chemistry and timing. Robin and Ted undoubtedly had chemistry. Meeting in their 20s? They didn’t have timing. Ted needed to have children in his life. Robin needed her career to take off. Once they had gotten the things they needed from their lives, it made sense that they circled back to each other. Later in their lives, they had the timing right, and they were ready to be together. The series ended the way it had to, even if the delivery was lackluster.
CRAZY EX GIRLFRIEND
There were so many great relationships in Crazy Ex Girlfriend. So many great combinations. Rebecca learned she needed to be alone so she could discover her her passion. Someone else who might have ended the series this way? Valencia. When she ultimately met her girlfriend, Beth, I liked Beth. Beth was funny. Beth was charming. Beth was a voice of reason for Valencia's emotion. But it was too convenient, that Beth helped Valencia with her party planning business, and the two just took off as a couple from there. I wish Valencia had been single for a longer time. Also, if the moral of Crazy Ex Girlfriend was about empowerment and finding yourself, I think maybe a few more characters could have been single instead of pairing off. You know, normalise the whole "being single" thing instead of making it something just Rebecca does. I would have loved to see more girl power from Valencia, and see what she could have accomplished on her own before settling down.
JOEY AND RACHEL
Rachel and Ross end up together. It feels like they’re supposed to be together. They’ve been coming back together and breaking up . . . but Rachel and Joey seemed perfectly matched. They were equally intelligent, she appreciated what he did for work. Joey admired Rachel, and also accepted her daughter. He also appreciated and respected the relationship between Rachel and Ross, understanding that Ross needed to be a bigger part in his daughter’s life. But, out of decency, kindness, and love, he also was there for Rachel no matter what. Joey could have been whatever Rachel needed in a partner. Rachel could have loved Joey deeper than any other person Joey dated throughout the series. But they were just too good friends to make it work. Who else wishes they could have "powered through it?"
CAPTAIN ED MERCER . . .
and literally anyone. I get that they're keeping Ed Mercer single for . . . probably a lot of reasons. They want him open to pursue relationships with people who later stab him in the back. Or maybe keep him single to keep a will they/won't they with his ex-wife Kelly. But I wish Ed's singleness would come to an end. With anyone but Kelly. I mean, I feel like he keeps going to Kelly due to familiarity/proximity (and because she's not a Krill). They keep realising that they're not right for each other. I don't worry about Kelly. She's fantastic and I know she's going to meet someone (or rock the single lifestyle). But Ed? I worry for that boy . . .
Have any other relationship opinions? Add them to the comments!